In the Yin classes I have been offering at Bend Yoga, I have focused on a theme. Each month I select a concept, or idea that I use throughout the classes and I read quotes or short stories or poems during each class that relate to that theme. In the month of January the focus was “letting go”. January is the month where typically everyone starts adding things to their plate…New Year’s resolutions become things that we must do, which adds a component of responsibility to these things we wish to add to our lives. But truly, before we can move forward on any path, in particular on a path that we may have never successfully navigated before (which is usually what our resolutions have to deal with) we need to let go of something. Whatever has been holding us back from moving forward and bringing this something into our lives before, we need to release. Perhaps it is a judgment, or an expectation … it could be anything, but we first must learn to let go before we can properly move forward.
I know that “they” say that we teach what we need to learn. Perhaps that is why “letting go” is something I am drawn to teach, because it is something that I personally need to remind myself to do frequently. Before coming on this trip I needed to have vaccinations. Being someone who is not a needle person, I have avoided them for most of my adult life. Now? I needed to face them head on. I don’t like to think about the “bad” things that “might” happen to me, and I don’t like to put things into my body (especially using needles) and here I had to put things into my body to avoid all those bad things I don’t like to think about, from happening. Talk about needing to release fear … it was a difficult experience for me. Tack on the fact that the doctor, as gentle and nice as she was, found it very necessary (her job, I am sure) to really instill in me the “dangers” and risks about all the different diseases and things that I might contract while here. And then, once she was done delivering her speech about the “bad” things, making sure I was sufficiently worried, she explained “Well, all that is nothing compared to the biggest danger. It will be more likely for you to be in a traffic accident than anything else”.
Now, I did a lot of reading and preparing before coming on this trip. Actually, I have been reading and preparing for years, just learning what I can about India. One of the constant themes in everything I read was that the driving here is crazy. However, nothing could have prepared me for what it is actually like. On my ride in the taxi from the airport to Satsanga, I was so amazed by what I was witnessing that I took pictures from the cab. Cars, (lots of them, all over) scooters (with entire families of four on one scooter, no one with helmets), people walking, buses filled to the brim, cows … all these things were fighting for space on the too narrow streets. Honking is the universal language of “I’m right behind” or “I’m passing” or “Move over quickly”. There are some lines painted in the streets, but even those seem just a decoration as people in cars and on scooters pass where they will, honking and waving and smiling as they go. I second guessed my thought that I would rent a scooter while here to get myself around. But, when I got to Satsanga, I realized that in order for me to experience anything, I needed a mode of transportation, and the scooter is what makes the most sense. So, I realized that I need to release and let go of this fear … the fear of driving the scooter, crashing and getting lost in the process.
Ayurvedic philosophy regarding someone with a constitution such as mine (Vata predominates, for those of you who are aware of the doshas) and who experiences worry, nervousness and anxiety, says that I need to cultivate faith in order to over come the challenges that are experienced because of the aforementioned worry, anxiety and fear. Because of my constitution, where I naturally go in times of stress is to worry. And to fear.
So, being in India and trying to live my studies and practice what I teach, I knew I had to release that fear. Yes? So, on a scooter I went. I started out great. Slow, but great. But, I hadn’t gotten very far and there were turns in the road. I haven’t quite gotten the hang of the lean-into-the turn thing … and well, off the road I went. Into a ditch. Thankfully going slowly enough that no damage was done to the bike OR to me. But boy was I stuck. So, of course my first thought was, “Darn, I am going to be late for yoga class”. And then, because I absolutely could not get the bike out of the ditch, I just stood there. And waited. Incredibly patiently and without any worry whatsoever (this place is rubbing off on me already! You absolutely must cultivate patience here.) I knew someone would be along shortly. I just had faith. And then, there they were. A truck full of beautiful Indian folk, ready to help. It took three strong men to get the bike out of the ditch and onto the road. I thanked them profusely and they waggled their heads and smiled. I’m sure they had a huge laugh about the crazy Western lady standing in a ditch.
And then I realized the worst had happened. I tried the bike, I crashed the bike, and I was still fine. And, my biggest fear of course had been the other drivers, but the road just happened to be completely empty (it was a back road) when I crashed, so proof right there that we are the ones who cause our own falls. And perhaps that is what happens when we hold onto the fears and the worries. And when we do let go, when we do step out, we may fall in a ditch, but if we can find that faith, there is always a way out. We just need to be patient and ask for it.
The scooter directly in front of the taxi had a family of 4 on it. The mother sitting side saddle in her beautiful Indian Sari and two small girls standing in the front of the scooter, smiling and waving as we drove by.
Scooters are the biggest source of transportation as you can see from this next shot taken of a side street in nearby Mapusa…the largest nearby city (approximately 65,000 people).